Romance With Real Live Horses

Reading a book about a barrel racer trying to make it to the National Rodeo Finals was one of the main factors in my decision to write. The author had a likeable, determined heroine, and her hero, well, any sane woman I know wouldn’t mind having him hang around the barn. The problem? The author hadn’t taken the time to research her subject. She knew the craft of writing her book, but she clearly hadn’t spent any time with a professional barrel racer. So, having never written anything before, I thought, “How hard can this be?” I decided I could write a better book. 

When you’re done laughing, I’ll continue.

I’m still waiting . . . Okay then.

Three years later, I’m revising that original book. I’ve spent countless hours writing then rewriting as I continue to learn all that I didn’t know. The rodeo and horse training information shows the reader a good view of reality, but I had to learn the writing craft, in particular, romance. It turns out writing is every bit as hard, if not harder, than training a champion barrel racing horse.

For some reason, authors who write about cops, Navy Seals and even time travel put a lot of effort in researching their subjects, but when it comes to cowboys and horses, they just put in any old thing they think sounds good, and that’s too bad. Most good trainers or riders will be more than happy to let you into their world and explain any questions. Barrel racers love to talk about their horses and lifestyle.

As I thought about most of the rodeo books I’ve found, I came up with ten facts many writers miss when including horses in their stories.

1       1.. Know the difference between a halter and a bridle. A halter is for leading a horse, and a bridle is for guiding and control of your horse when riding.

2.     2. Stalls are bedded down with straw or shavings, not hay. Hay is fed in specific amounts according to the horse. The porky ones need less than the nervous ones.

3    3. If your heroine is riding a top-rate barrel horse, don’t have her make fast runs ten times a day to practice. Real reining, rodeo or cutting horses are athletes. To keep them focused, calm and confident, trainers work them slowly and rarely run at full speed except during an event.

4.      4. Learn the terms of the tack used on your horse. A cinch or girth is used to secure a saddle, not a strap.

5.     5. Finished (trained and hauled) horses are comfortable riding long distances in today’s trailers and even sleeping in them. They don’t need to sleep in their own stall at night.

6.    6. Most of the time when horses sleep, they remain standing and only lay down for short periods. Their brains are active when they lay down to protect against predators.

7.    7.  Well-trained horses will stand tied to the trailer quietly while the rodeo or horseshow bustles around them, although sheep will sometimes provide a negative response.  (I have personal experience with this one.)

8.    8. Unlike in the cowboy movies, real horses don’t whinny at danger. The only times most horses make noise is when their buddy is taken away. They are very herd oriented.

9.     9. Horses aren’t afraid of snakes. They don’t rear and throw their riders off at the sight of a snake in the road. They usually don’t notice them.

      10.  Rodeoing is one of the most unique and exciting sports in the world, but it is also hard work. It involves all night drives, lack of sleep and taking care of your horse before yourself. You make split-second decisions to help your horse by giving the right cues, all while running at top speed. A winning run at a professional rodeo is under 17 seconds. Winners work hard and treat it as a business.

I hope this has been of some help. I’ve spent most of my life around horses and wouldn’t change that for the world.

Oh, one more thing. When your heroine starts into the arena to make her run at the BIG rodeo, don’t have your hero take the microphone from the announcer and ask, “Will you marry me?”

She won’t stop her horse, get tears in her eyes and say yes, as the crowd stands and cheers. She’ll try to regain her concentration enough to complete her run then she’ll hunt down the hero with murder in her eyes. It kind of ruins the Happily Ever After.

I’m just saying…

The Cowboy and the Trophy Gopher

Being a good farmer takes a certain type of personality. I don’t have it. The cowboy and I have raised cattle and hay for the last thirty years, usually with seventy or more acres of hay. 

Now, I tend to be rather laid back when it comes to farming. The water will eventually get to the bottom of the field. Most of the hay will grow. What’s so hard about this?

On the other hand, the cowboy has an elaborate set of farming rules. We argued about, uh, discussed our differing opinions for several years until I found a job in town, and he farmed to his heart’s content.

One of the scourges of growing that much alfalfa is a small rodent called a gopher. It moves into a perfectly nice field, has tons of babies and each digs holes at an unbelievable rate. As the irrigation water runs down the field and into a hole, it disappears. The area below the hole dries out, and the hay dies.

The cowboy has waged all-out war on these burrowing invaders for years, checking his traps daily, spring, summer and fall. During this time, he’s tried repeatedly to convince me that since my hands are smaller, it would be easier for me to set the traps. I’m proud to say I didn’t fall for this con.

The county pays two dollars a tail and with three hundred gophers a year, this is a nice little side line. He’s saved the tails and cashed them in and the bodies were…well, let’s just say our dog Cindy was a gopher gourmet. Three years ago, he checked his trap line and found a trap was stuck. When the cowboy finally worked it free, there he was, Humongo-Gopher. It was the biggest gopher he’d ever trapped, maybe the biggest gopher in the world. 

He told his friends about Humongo, and they scoffed. Forced to take action, he took  the body in for a viewing and was proven right. All agreed it was the biggest rodent they’d seen. It was a fact. We owned a trophy gopher. Now how many people can say that? Since it was a trophy, we couldn’t feed it to the dog, so it went into the freezer to be preserved for posterity.

The problem is I don’t have much of a memory. If it isn’t in front of my face, I tend to forget it exists. Because of that, I’ve spent the last three years calmly going to my big freezer to get meat for dinner only to be confronted each time I opened the door by long yellow teeth and curved claws. Humongo looked like he could leap off the shelf and attack. The only thing that kept me from jumping out of my skin was the fact he was enclosed in a Zip Lock bag. Still, it was a shock.

Humongo finally went to the big gopher heaven in the sky this fall, and I no longer have to fear my freezer. The cowboy suggested we have a taxidermist mount Humongo and put him in the trophy room with the Elk and Deer antlers. That’s where I put my foot down. I guess in the cowboy’s mind a trophy is a trophy but really, Humongo was just a super-sized rodent.

Giving Thanks

Its the end of November already and I'm mentally still in July. Where did the time go? That's a universal question and I've yet to find an answer. As I thought about this, I realized that by making it a policy to celebrate each holiday, I'm marking the passing of the year and having fun. That way 365 days don't slip by unnoticed.
As for giving thanks on this holiday, here are my top three reasons to be thankful.
1. My husband and children. Not to brag or anything, but I have a daughter who is an emergency room psychologist, a son who is a certified diesel mechanic and a son who is currently working on his doctorate in Physics at the CERN Lab in Switzerland. Wow, who knew two country folks could produce such smart, caring individuals. Oh, and don't forget, a great husband who doesn't read romance but he reads mine. Okay, I'm bragging just a little.
2. My parents. Although they are getting up in age, are both doing well and living life to the fullest.
3. My critique partners. I have smart, intelligent and fun people who encourage me every step of the way through my writing career.
What are you most thankful for today?